More tranny stories later!
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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