Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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