I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
