You really coming over, don't trick.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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