Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
