as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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