I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
