Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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