if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
