Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
