I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
