I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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