i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Sorry about my life...
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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