dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Just pee around me
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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