just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
