I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
