We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize