Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
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