is this the sara with the beer cane?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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