Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
