i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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