You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
At least life still wants to fuck me.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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