Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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