Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
