How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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