I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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