Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
