We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
