we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
