He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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