Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize