You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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