try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
