Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
