We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize