so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Randomize
