My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
