Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
