He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize