sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
