this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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