I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
