Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
