All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
