white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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