oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
