ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize