Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
