i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I smell stomach acid.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize