i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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