I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
